HOW TO SELECT THE RIGHT PERSON.

HOW TO RECRUIT THE RIGHT PERSON FOR THE JOB? Put about 100 bricks in some Particular order in a closed Room with an Open window.   Then send 2 or 3 candidates in The room and close the door. Leave them alone and come back After 6 hours and then analyze The situation. If they are counting the Bricks. Put them in the accounts Department.   If they are recounting them.. Put them in auditing ..   if they have messed up the Whole place with the bricks. Put them in engineering. If they are arranging the Bricks in some strange order. Put them in planning.     If they are throwing the Bricks at each other. Put them in operations ...   If they are sleeping. Put them in security.   If they have broken the bricks Into pieces. Put them in information Technology. If they are sitting idle. Put them in human resources. If they say they have tried Different combinations, yet Not a brick has Been moved. Put them in sales.   If they have already left for The day. Put them in marketing. if they are staring out of the Window. Put them on strategic Planning. And then last but not least. If they are talking to each Other and not a single brick Has been Moved.   congratulate them and put them In top management.

Team work when the Team leader is absent!!!

Team work when the Team leader is absent !!!

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Bush in Primary School

BUSH IN PRIMARY SCHOOL GEORGE BUSH GOES TO A PRIMARY SCHOOL TO TALK ABOUT THE WAR. AFTER HIS TALK HE OFFERS QUESTION TIME.ONE LITTLE BOY PUTS UP HIS HAND AND GEORGE ASKS HIM WHAT IS YOUR NAME IS. "BOB". AND WHAT IS YOUR QUESTION, BOB? I HAVE 3 QUESTIONS. FIRST,WHY DID THE USA INVADE IRAQ WITHOUT THE SUPPORT OF THE UN? SECOND,WHY ARE YOU PRESIDENT WHEN AL GORE GOT MORE VOTES? AND THIRD,WHAT HAPPEND TO OSAMA BIN LADEN? JUST THEN THE BELL RINGS FOR RECESS. GEORGE BUSH INFORMS THE KIDDIES THAT THEY WILL CONTINUE AFTER RECESS. WHEN THEY RESUME GEORGE SAY,OK WHERE WERE WE? OH THAT,S RIGHT.......... QUESTION TIME. WHO HAS A QUESTION? A DIFFERENT LITTLE BOY PUTS UP HIS HAND. GEORGE POINTS HIM OUT AND ASKS HIM WHAT HIS NAME IS? "STEVE" AND WHAT IS YOUR QUESTION STEVE? I HAVE 5 QUESTIONS. FIRST,WHY DID THE USA INVADE IRAQ WITHOUT THE SUPPORT OF UN? SECOND,WHY ARE YOU PRESIDENT WHEN AL GORE GOT MORE VOTES? THIRD,WHAT HAPPENED TO OSAMA BIN LADEN? FOURTH,WHY DID THE RECESS BELL GO 20 MINUTES EARLY? AND FIFTH, WHERE IS "BOB".

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Just For Laugh2 :))

JUST FOR LAUGH... MUTHU & THE INTERVIEWER Interviewer: What is your birth date? Muthu : 13th October Interviewer: Which year? Muthu: ... EVERY YEAR MUTHU & HIS MANAGER Manager asked to Muthu at an interview.... Can you spell a word that has more than 100 letters in it? Muthu replied: P-O-S-T-B-O- X MUTHU & LONDON TRIP After returning back from a foreign trip, Muthu asked his wife, Do I look like a foreigner? Wife : No! Why? Muthu : In London, a lady asked me, "Are you a foreigner?".. that's why ... MUTHU & TOURIST One tourist from U.S.A.asked to Muthu whether any great man born in this village or not .. and Muthu said .. "No sir, only babies were born here." MUTHU & HIS EXPERIMENT Muthu was experimenting with a cockroach. First he cut off oneof it's leg and told WALK. WALK. Cockroach walked. Then he cutoff it'ssecond leg and told the same. Cockroach walked. Then he cut off the third leg and did the same. At last he cut off it's fourth leg and ordered it walk! But cockroach didn't walk. Suddenly Muthu said loudly, "I found it. If we cut cockroach's four legs, it becomes deaf. Muthu become a saint! MUTHU & DRIVER When Muthu was travelling with his wife in a motorised tricycle, the driver adjusted mirror. Muthu shouted, "Are you trying to see my wife?Came sit backhere and I will drive. MUTHU GOES TO HOTEL Muthu went in a hotel. To wash hands he went to the washbasin. There he started washing the basin. Seeing this, the manager asked what was he doing. Muthu pointed towards the board "WASHBASIN" MUTHU & INTERVIEWER - FINAL PART Interviewer : Just imagine your in 20th floor in a building, it caught fire and how will you escape ? Muthu : It's simple.. I will just stop my imagination . :) Oh .. i forgot . the funniest part ... On a political rally Muthu was arrested. Why ???????????? Because, a woman journalist walking with a badge wrote "PRESS" on her right chest ... and he did it !

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Billionaire cOllege drOpouts

Bill Gates (billu) Are college dropouts more successful than people with good education? It would seem so if you consider that many billionaires are people who dumped college. However, what this hides is the fact that although millions quit studies before completing them, very few of them go on to become rich. What the list of the super-rich dropouts signifies is that in business, a top degree is not as important as having the right aptitude, attitude, determination and vision. Here are some dropouts who went on to become billionaires: William Henry Gates III (1955-), along with Paul Allen, co-founded Microsoft Corporation, the world's largest software maker. Bill Gates, the wealthiest person in the world with an estimated net worth of $480 crores (Rs 211,200 crore!), is probably the best-known college dropout. Gates attended an exclusive prep school in Seattle, went on to study at Harvard University, then dropped out to pursue software development. As students in the mid-70s, he and Paul Allen wrote the original Altair BASIC interpreter for the Altair 8800, the first commercially successful PC. In 1975, Micro-Soft - later Microsoft Corporation - was born. Three decades on, Gates has been Number One on the Forbes 400 for over a dozen years. And here's something you probably didn't know: The Bill & Melinda Gates Foundation currently provides 90 per cent of the world budget for the attempted eradication of polio. Larry Ellison Lawrence Joseph Ellison (1944-) , co-founder and CEO of Oracle Corporation, founded his company in 1977 with a sum of $2,000. Once a school dropout, he is now, according to Forbes, one of the richest people in America with a net worth of around $184 crores. The figure also makes him the ninth richest in the world. As a young man, Ellison worked for the Ampex Corporation, where one of his projects was a database for the CIA. He called it Oracle, a name he was to reuse years later for the company that made him famous. Interestingly, the organisation's initial release was Oracle 2. The number supposedly implied that all bugs had been eliminated from an earlier version. Ellison is quite a colourful man, and has long dabbled in all kinds of things. Want to learn more? Try his biography, The Difference Between God and Larry Ellison. Dhirubhai Ambani Dhirajlal Hirachand Ambani (1932-2002) was born into the family of a schoolteacher. It was a family of modest means. When he turned 16, Dhirubhai moved to Aden, working first as a gas-station attendant, then as a clerk in an oil company.

He returned to India at 26, starting a business with a meagre capital of $375. By the time of his demise, his company - Reliance Industries Ltd - had grown to become an empire, with an estimated annual turnover of $120 crores!

Dhirubhai was, in his lifetime, conferred the Indian Entrepreneur of the 20th Century Award by the Federation of Indian Chambers of Commerce and Industry. A Times of India poll in the year 2000 also voted him one of the biggest creators of wealth in this century.

Dhirubhai's is not just the usual rags-to-riches story. He will be remembered as the one who rewrote Indian corporate history and built a truly global corporate group. He is also credited with having single-handedly breathed life into the Indian stock markets and bringing in thousands of investors to the bourses.

Steve Jobs

Steven Paul Jobs (1955-) and Apple Computer are names that have long gone together.

Born in the United States to an unknown Egyptian-Arab father, Jobs was adopted soon after birth. After graduating high school, he enrolled in Reed College, dropping out after one semester.

In 1976, 21-year-old Jobs and 26-year old Steve Wozniak founded Apple Computer Co. in the family garage. Jobs revolutionised the industry by popularising the concept of home computers.

By 1984, the Macintosh was introduced. He had an influential role in the building of the World-Wide Web, and also happens to be Chairman and CEO of Pixar Animation Studios.

Today, with the iPod, Apple is bigger than ever. Incidentally, Jobs worked for several years at an annual salary of $1. It got him a listing in the Guinness Book as `Lowest Paid Chief Executive Officer.' He was once gifted a $9 crores jet by the company though. And his net worth? Moer than $3 billion.

Michael Dell

Michael Saul Dell (1965- ) joined the University of Texas at Austin with the intention of becoming a physician. While studying there, he started a computer company in his dormitory, calling it PC's Limited. By the time he turned 19, it had notched up enough success to prompt Dell to dropout.

In 1987, PC's Limited changed its name to Dell Computer Corporation. By 2003, Dell, Inc. was the world's most profitable PC manufacturer.

Dell has won more than his fair share of accolades, including Man of the Year from PC Magazine and EM>CEO of the Year from Financial World . Forbes, in 2005, lists him as the 18th richest in the world with a net worth of around $1600 Crores. Not bad for just another dropout.

Subhash Chandra Goel

Here's something not many people know about Subhash Chandra Goel : The Zee chairman dropped out after standard 12.

Subhash Chandra started his own vegetable oils unit at 19. It was, in a manner of speaking, his first job. Years later, a casual visit to a friend at Doordarshan gave him the idea of starting his own broadcasting company. We all know how that story ran.

Chandra knew nothing about programming, distribution or film rights. What he did understand quite well was the Indian sensibility though. Funded by UK businessmen, Zee came into being as India's first satellite TV network.
Today, it reaches 320 lakhs homes, connecting with 20 crores people in South Asia alone. The network also covers Asians in America, the Middle East, Europe, Australia and Africa, making this dropout a very rich one.

THE VALUE OF A DRINK ... Brilliant One!!!!

The Value of a Drink "Sometimes when I reflect back on all the wine I drink I feel shame. Then I look into the glass and think about the workers in the vineyards and all of their hopes and dreams .. If I didn't drink this wine, they might be out of work and their dreams would be shattered. Then I say to myself, "It is better that I drink this wine and let their dreams come true than be selfish and worry about my liver." ~ Jack Handy WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may leave you wondering what the hell happened to your bra and panties. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day. " ~Frank Sinatra WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may create the illusion that you are tougher, smarter, faster and better looking than most people. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading." ~ Henny Youngman WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may lead you to think people are laughing WITH you. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case. Coincidence? I think not." ~ Stephen Wright WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause you to think you can sing. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "When we drink, we get drunk. When we get drunk, we fall asleep. When we fall asleep, we commit no sin. When we commit no sin, we go to heaven. So, let's all get drunk and go to heaven!" ~ Brian O'Rourke WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause pregnancy. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy." ~ Benjamin Franklin WARNING: The consumption of alcohol is a major factor in dancing like a retard. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "Without question, the greatest invention in the history of mankind is beer. Oh, I grant you that the wheel was also a fine invention, but the wheel does not go nearly as well with pizza." ~ Dave Barry WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause you to tell your friends over and over again that you love them. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ To some it's a six-pack, to me it's a Support Group. Salvation in a can! ~ Dave Howell WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may make you think you can logically converse with members of the opposite sex without spitting. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ And saving the best for last, as explained by Cliff Clavin,of Cheers. One afternoon at Cheers, Cliff Clavin was explaining the BuffaloTheory to his buddy Norm. Here's how it went: "Well ya see, Norm, it's like this... A herd of buffalo can only move as fast as the slowest buffalo. And when the herd is hunted, it is the slowest and weakest ones at the back that are killed first This natural selection is good for the herd as a whole, because the general speed and health of the whole group keeps improving by the regular killing of the weakest members. In much the same way, the human brain can only operate as fast as the slowest brain cells. Excessive intake of alcohol, as we know, kills brain cells. But naturally, it attacks the slowest and weakest brain cells first. In this way, regular consumption of beer eliminates the weaker brain cells, making the brain a faster and more efficient machine. That's why you always feel smarter after a few beers." WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may make you think you are whispering when you are not

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CRIME IS REALY GETTING OUT OF HAND

CRIME IS REALY GETTING OUT OF HAND But never thout that, this may happen :)

Have you ever felt like doing this?

Have you ever felt like doing this? * * * * * * * * * * * * Next time try this and see :)

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Who inspired Salman Khan's hair style for the movie:TERENAAM...

Who inspired Salman Khan's hair style for the movie:TERE NAAM... Any Guesses!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Moral....tooo Good..

 

 

A Man to God

Man:"Give me a bag full of money, a job and a vehicle full of girls"

God replies:"so it be, my son"
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Made him a bus conductor of APSRTC Ladies special bus!

Moral: Requirement specification should be CLEAR-CUT JJJ ........

Reasons why ladies today are still SINGLE

Reasons why ladies today are still SINGLE:       1. The nice men are ugly.   2. The handsome men are not nice.   3. The handsome and nice men are gay.   4. The handsome, nice and heterosexual men are married.   5. The men who are not so handsome, but are nice men, have no money.   6. The men who are not so handsome, but are nice men with money think we are only after their money.   7. The handsome men without money are after our money.   8. The handsome men, who are not so nice and somewhat heterosexual, don't think we are beautiful enough.   9. The men who think we are beautiful, that are heterosexual, somewhat nice and have money, are cowards.   10. The men who are somewhat handsome, somewhat nice and have some money and thank God are heterosexual, are shy and NEVER MAKE THE FIRST MOVE!!!!   11. The men who never make the first move, automatically lose interest in us when we take the initiative.         NOW, WHO THE HELL UNDERSTANDS MEN? "Men are like a fine wine. They all start out like grapes, and it's our job to stomp on them and keep them in the dark until they mature into something you'd like to have dinner with"

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MY OBJECTIVE OF THE WEEK !!

MY OBJECTIVE OF THE WEEK  * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * Monday                      Tuesday               Wednesday                       Thursday                        Friday

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NATURE AT ITS BEST

SWITZERLAND........................................

madhubalan

The most mind-boggling picture - worth watching again

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